Garden Principles IId – Personal Note Regarding Unequally Yoked Spouses

Now I put a star at the end of the previous post because I don’t want this to be misunderstood. I feel like often people think of male-female relationships as one-sided, as though the actions of each are one-directional. Rather, I think that a synergy is supposed to exist and that synergy is achieved through intimacy. I touched on this in the section on Eve and Women, but I think it is worth emphasizing so that I am not misunderstood. Again let’s consider Christ and the Church. When we as members of the Church have a concern, do we just wait idly by for the Lord to reveal what we are supposed to do? No. What do we do? We talk to Jesus. We pray (talk) to Him. We actively seek Him. We express our concerns, our hopes, and our desires to Him. It is a two-way communication, a partnership. We move toward Him and He moves toward us. This is as it should be between a husband and wife also. They are to communicate with each other; the husband is to listen to and fully consider the concerns, hopes, and desires of his wife, and she is to listen to and fully consider his counsel.

Now, as for submitting to (trusting) your husband’s guidance, I personally only feel that a woman should trust the guidance of a Godly man who is truly striving for enlightenment and intimacy with Jesus Christ. This is my PERSONAL opinion, absolutely not me saying that I have read this in the Bible. I would encourage you to do your own searching on this and bring this question to the Lord. But for me personally, it just makes sense that a Godly woman can have peace submitting to (trusting) a Godly man because he is striving to live according to the husband role  established by God, and is therefore plugged into God and living to exemplify Christ in his daily walk. Thus, if he is submitting to (trusting) God, as she is submitting to (trusting) him (the husband), there is an overall submission (trust) in the Lord. But if the husband is not a Christian actively in the word and actively striving to live according to Christ’s principles, then she is trusting a man who is not trusting God and not weighing all of his decisions in Christ. Rather, in such a marriage, I feel that the wife should look to Christ alone to be her head and to counsel her in matters related to her marriage and life.

Now, because the roles are different, my opinion will be different for men. In my personal opinion, men should still live as the head with their non-Christian wives. They should be ever-connected with God and counsel their wives according to His principles. I would hope that in living this role, he would be successful in leading her to the Lord.

Again, this is just how I see it. I am still studying the Word on this, and Lord please reveal to me if this is wrongful thinking and, if it is, guide me in Your Word to Your truth.

NOTE: God bless Brother wellis32 for reminding me of 1Peter3:1-7:

[1] Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; [2] While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. [3] Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; [4] But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. [5] For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: [6] Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.  [7] Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

I will have to pray on this a bit more. I’ll come back to this post.

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